Wedding Wednesday- Wedding Planning Update

Hey everyone! As I plan my wedding, I've decided to do an update each month of where I stand. Hopefully this will be helpful to you guys as you plan your own weddings. I'll say this- wedding planning is hard! There are so many variables and opinions and just when you think you know what you want or other people want, a wrench gets thrown in and you get all confused again. The advice I've been getting so far is to do only what you want and not listen to what anyone else says. So that's my focus for right now! 

Accomplishments:

Engagement party has been planned and is now complete! It was so much fun to plan and do. You can see the post here and how I planned it here.

Engagement photo shoot- complete! I didn't really plan to do one of these, but a few people on Facebook did one and they looked like fun. Plus we hired a photographer for the engagement party so we wrapped it up in that. Hopefully we'll get the photos back soon!

Wedding dress shopping was attempted. I found some really great ones and I thought I found "the one", but I was afraid it might be a little much. Seeing my MIL and sister's faces kinda cemented that fear for me, so that was a HUGE bummer. Like, I could cry tears of stress bummer. I've bounced back though and I'm so excited to try on more pretty dresses and find the real "one"! (Update: it was this one, and I loved the one I chose in the end SO much better!)

Needs to get done:

Wedding venue needs to be booked! This is priority #1 for me. Picking a venue has been really, really hard! Between budget restrictions and differing opinions, finding a venue has been an uphill battle. They say that if you can have a short engagement, you should and I'm starting to understand why! Now that we are seemingly running out of time, I think that we will be more motivated to make the tough decisions. Even just narrowing down a geographical location would help! My wedding is about a year away and I have no idea exactly where or when it'll be. This is a huge stress factor but I plan to at least have solid options, if not a decision, at the end of this month.

To bridesmaid or not to bridesmaid? I'm currently conflicted between having bridesmaids or only having my sister up there with me. Several people have suggested just keeping my sister, which is probably the route I will take to avoid added stress, but it seems so odd not to have my girls with me. 

Save the dates and wedding invitations need to be planned out. I'm thinking of having my sister create these for me, so I need to get her some inspiration so she can start working on it. I want them to be ready to go for when we finally pick a venue!

Such a long list of things to do, and although it feels like I have loads of time, I know it'll creep up on me! What's on your wedding to-do list?

Be sure to follow my colorful wedding ideas Pinterest board for gorgeous bouquets, amazing centerpieces, and more!

How NOT to Tell People You're Engaged

Welcome to Wedding Wednesdays! I figured I'd do something a little different this week and talk about our engagement story. This weekend marks my 5th anniversary with John, so it’s a good time to share the story, don'tcha think? Even though I had been politely asking (nagging) him for quite some time, I honestly had NO idea it was coming! Here's how it went down.

My foxy fiance, John, and I went to Chicago in October for Blythecon. The night before we left, we had the inspection for the house we put an offer on and eventually purchased. We were super excited about this next stage of home ownership, so that was all we could talk about. 

Once we arrived in Chicago, we planned to meet up with some friends before Blythecon. I was gathering up all my stuff to bring, and there was a lot (my camera, a jacket, 7 dolls!). Since I'm weak, I figured it would make sense to split the stuff I was bringing and have John carry half in his backpack. I picked up his bag and before I could even open the zipper, John came over. He was super defensive about his backpack, and insisted that I carry my stuff in my own bag, which I could then pass to him once I "really couldn't carry it anymore". Mhm, ok jerk... Turns out, the ring was in his backpack and he didn't want me to see it!

Me and John with the dolls he got me.

The next day was Blythecon, which was a super long day at the gorgeous Bridgeport Art Center. We were wandering around at all the sales tables, and I found a doll I liked. John asked if I wanted her, and I wasn't sure between her and another doll. For those that don't know, Blythe dolls, especially at the convention, aren't cheap. These aren't $20 Barbie dolls! So when John offered to buy me both, I was over the moon. He really doesn't buy me doll items, so when he does, I cherish them. As we walked away from the table, he told me I better like it because he wasn't going to ever buy me anything again. I told him I was super happy and that if he wanted to, he could just propose to me with the doll instead of buying a ring. He chuckled and said something like, "yea, right" and we went back to our table. Up until this point he was going with the whole "I'm not ready for marriage" lie.

John having oh-so much fun at Blythecon.

After a long day at Blythecon, we headed back to the hotel to drop off our stuff. John was trying to find a nice restaurant for us, but I'm a super picky eater. None of the nice restaurants had anything I liked, so he suggested Fridays and I got a little too excited. We went to Fridays and watched the Mets game, then headed back before it ended. Dinner went quickly, but I figured we were just tired.

Back at the hotel, we were sitting on the bed watching the end of the Mets game, and John started his speech. I can't remember exactly what he said but it was something like this.
John: "You know I love you, right?"
Me: "Yea."
J: "And you know I can't imagine my life without you, right?"
Me: (Semi-apathetically because he says that a lot) "Yea, where are you going with this?"
J: Chuckles nervously and reaches for the nightstand.
Me, in my head: What is he reaching for?? Is he going to ask me? Am I going crazy? Oh, he's not reaching for the nightstand, he's reaching for the remote. Well that's embarrassing. STOP BEING CRAZY CATHY!

At this point, he turns off the TV (huge deal, because it was the playoffs game for the World Series) and then opens the nightstand. He pulls out a little box and goes down on one knee and I am in complete shock. He asked me to marry him and I couldn't utter a word. Nothing was in my head, except racing thoughts that I had to say something, anything. All that I could squeak out was "Are you serious?" and he replied with a smile "No, it's just an elaborate joke." After staring at him for what seemed like an eternity (with my mind reminding me I needed to speak!), I finally said yes.

Selfie sticks for the win!

I thought I would cry when I got engaged, but I couldn't because I was in complete shock. My body was on fire and I was shaking. John seriously thought I was going to pass out. I really wanted to call my parents and tell them, but John said that in an effort to keep it a total surprise, he didn't tell anyone about his plans. So, for a few days, it was our little secret. 

When we got back to NY, we went to dinner with my parents and I decided the way I wanted to tell them was to give them the whole long elaborate story before sneaking in the news to surprise them. Take my advice... that is not the best way to do it! When I finally got to that part, it seemed so nonchalant that they didn't believe me for a minute.  They kept asking if I was joking and after we insisted we weren't, it finally sunk in. My mom was so excited about it, but my dad and sister were still in shock until the next day. When we told John's mom, she was super excited and kept saying "I knew it!"

The bed in the hotel room where we got engaged!

It's now been over 7 months that John and I have been engaged, and we are just starting to make headway on our wedding planning. We can get this wedding thing done in only a year, right?! After spending about 2 months disagreeing about where we should get married, we finally seem to be on the same page about geographical location. Now we just need to pick a venue and set a date! I know our guests are probably anxious to find out.

Was your engagement a surprise, or did you see it coming? I want to know! 

Why I chose Zola For My Wedding Registry

Today's Wedding Wednesday is all about registries. Picking out gifts for people to buy for you- what could be better! I'm using Zola for my registry, and I'm loving it! Zola is great because it has a clean interface, makes suggestions, and has a great phone app.  It even has a browser button you can download to add things to your registry with the click of a button! Check out more of their features below.

Clean Interface

Zola's organized, easy-to-use interface makes it simple to search for items by category, room, or brand. It's also really easy for your guests to see what's been purchased.

Browser Button

Zola has a super handy "add to Zola" button, so that you can add things to your registry right from the webpage! It works in a similar way the Pinterest button does.

Suggestions

Zola has loads of suggestions, and even has lists of the basic items you'll need with options in various price ranges.

Gift Tracker

The gift tracker shows how many items were purchased, who bought them, and their value.  You can even export the list to excel! This will make "thank you" notes super easy.

Group Contribution Option

For large ticket items, you have the option to allow guests to contribute towards the purchase. Even if you don't get enough funds to purchase the item, you get to keep all the credits to make a purchase on their site.  The credits never expire!

Phone App

On the mobile app, you can edit your registry on the go! You can browse their extensive database or use the barcode scanner in stores. You can also use their Blender setting to explore random items, and swipe left or right to add or skip!

Control Shipping

With Gift Tracker, you can decide whether you want an item shipped to you right away, or if you want them to hold it for a later time.

Online Gift Swap

Change your mind on an item you selected? No problem! You can convert the gifts into credit, or exchange them before you receive them. Easy peasy!

Gift Options

You can add experiences (like cheese of the month or cooking classes), funds (like a honeymoon or downpayment), or fun weekend items (like a tent or bike).

So what do you think? Are you ready to create an account? Let me know your email address and we'll each get $50!

Wedding Wednesdays: 5 Tips for Getting Started (Plus Free Budget Printable!)

Last week, I shared my first Wedding Wednesday post. After trying out a designated day for wedding planning, I realized it was a great way to get the wedding ball rolling. It really helped to get my fiance involved without having to nag him. Want to try it out? Here are my 5 tips to make your first meeting a success- plus a free printable to get you started!

 1. Make it fun. For some people, wedding planning isn't exactly how they imagine spending their Wednesday evenings. Crazy, right?! To make it fun, I ordered a tasty dinner from my fiance's favorite Italian restaurant- my treat. Since this was the first week I was doing it, I wanted to make it as pleasant an experience as possible so we could continue it without him dreading it. You can also try creating a fun playlist or making it into a friendly game or competition (who can find the most affordable venues, person who found the band gets a dinner date of their choice, etc.)

2. Encourage participation. For my fiance, "wedding planning" meant listening to me babble on and on about locations and venues while he looked up from his phone every once in a while and nodded. Instead of grumping at him to get off his phone, or complaining that he's ALWAYS on it, I decided to be friendly instead. I suggested he grab his laptop and set it up next to me so we could research together. If we both search, we spend half as long looking. Or that's what I told him, anyway!

3. Come prepared. Choose a topic or two that you think is important to discuss and work on creating a solution. For us, it was location and budget. I created a worksheet that stated how much money I had set aside for the wedding, how much my fiance had, and how much each of us would save up over the next year or so.  Then, I added any contributions from family and tallied it all up. This will be our estimated budget. This first step really helped us to eliminate options that were not affordable. 

4. Keep it positive. It's really easy to be defensive, especially if you have your heart set on what your wedding should be. Throughout the process, remind yourself that responding with an attitude never helped anyone. It's perfectly fine to assert yourself, but don't resort to insults or extreme statements, like "you always...." or "you never....". Instead, explain your side and ask lots of questions to understand their feelings. Do they really dislike the venue, or do they think it costs too much? Can you compromise on something that is important to them?

5. Summarize and plan ahead. At the end of your meeting, take a minute to go over everything you discussed to make sure everyone is on the same page. Create an agenda for the next week or an assignment that will be discussed at the next meeting.

Working on figuring out your overall budget?  Download my free printable to get started!

What are your tips for making wedding planning more enjoyable? 

Wedding Wednesdays- How to plan your wedding (once a week!) and save your marriage

Planning a wedding can be downright exhausting. Unlike any other party you've planned, this one seems to hold so much more significance! It seems like everyone has an opinion on what you should do, where you should go, and who you should invite. I've just started planning, and I feel like I've already hit a brick wall. My budget is way below market, I live in the most expensive place to get married (p.s. that's #1, 2 & 5 on the list!), and my fiance has a huge family that we need to invite. All of this is enough to cause anyone stress, including someone who plans parties regularly!

I recently had lunch with a friend/former coworker, and I was discussing (complaining) about how the stress of wedding planning is already causing my fiance and me to argue. In addition, since I love to plan parties and he does not, I feel like the entire burden falls on my shoulders. At this time, my friend made a genius suggestion- pick a day and make that "wedding discussion day". For me, that's Wedding Wednesdays. As soon as I heard it, I was intrigued, and it only gets better! She's one of the smartest people I know, and I'm so lucky to have her inspiring me.

My fiance and I are also having some disagreements about location and other details. This is where Wedding Wednesdays is perfect. Each Wednesday, you can discuss a specific topic or set of tasks that need completion. Then, you can decide what the next week's agenda will entail. This gives each party a fair one week to research their options. At the next meeting, couples share their findings and make decisions. If one person does not do their research by the deadline, then they are essentially not prepared for the meeting. At this point, the decision will likely sway in the favor of the person who did their homework.

To be fair, I think that an extension should be granted for certain topics, but overall it should allow for much smoother and quicker decision making. This method is also great if you have parents or bridesmaids that are helping. Instead of trying to coordinate schedules, there is one set day for everyone to get together and discuss.

Today, my fiance and I will have our very first Wedding Wednesday. I'll post an update next week with a recap of our meeting and some suggestions to get the most out of your first meeting! (Psst! Check it out here.)

Do you have any sneaky tips on how to be more efficient in your wedding planning? Let me know in the comments below!

Be sure to check out my colorful wedding ideas Pinterest board for some great wedding ideas!